Caroline O’Donoghue, author ofScenes of a Graphic Nature‘An absolute *blinder* … so so funny and sexy. So excited now to read everything by Crystal Jeans’

Kate Davies, winner of the Polari Prize‘A glorious celebration of queer friendship and all kinds of love. Funny, outrageous, heartbreaking and so much fun’

Irish Independent‘Hilarious, fresh and sexy, with a tale that takes the reader from Egypt to Hollywood’

Matt Cain‘Funny, filthy and phenomenally good’

S.J. Watson‘Filthy and hilarious, this is a gloriously naughty romp of a read that also has something serious to say about queer love. I didn’t want it to end’

DIVA‘Perfect for fans of and … a delicious and diligent piece of fiction that will provide you with enough great comebacks to last a lifetime… This is a delightful book I wish to fling at my friends with affectionate abandon'Tipping the VelvetGentleman Jack

Jess Kidd‘By turns raucous and poignant, hilarious and shattering this is a wonder of a story’

Rowan Pelling,DAILY MAIL‘This delicious romp is the sort of thing Nancy Mitford might have written if she’d been gay… wonderfully blithe, witty and moving’

1921: a boy, a girl, a moonlit midnight kiss.

A terrible, repulsive kiss.

Bettina and Bart have grown up as best friends, so surely they will end up together? After all, Bettina is young, rich, headstrong…. and gay. Bart is young, rich, charismatic… and also, definitely, gay. Any doubts are dispelled by, in short order: that ghastly kiss; a torrid encounter for Bettina in the school boiler-rooms; and an eye-opening Parisian visit for Bart.

Society will never stand for it. What else can they do but enter into a ‘lavender marriage’ and carry on indulging their true natures in secret? As the ’20s and ’30s whizz past in a haze of cigarettes, champagne and casual sex, Bart and Bettina have no idea that they are hurtling, via Hollywood and Egypt, Paris and London, towards tragedy and bloodshed…